One of the strangest things about being an adult is realizing that people you thought you knew, people you’ve known all of your life, aren’t who you thought at all.

I understand people getting emotional about events, or things or other people. I do get emotional sometimes. But then I calm down, try to put my emotions on the side and look at the issue rationally. That gives me the power over the situation back, because I chose to take control and not let my emotions lead me. 

Letting our emotions control the way we look at situations and giving them control over our actions is not a smart move. Our emotions can be deceiving.

Here’s an example, just because I feel hurt or attacked by something someone said to me, because I feel that the tone of the person’s voice wasn’t a certain way. Doesn’t mean the words that were spoken were meant in the way I assumed because of my interpretation of the tone of someone’s voice. 

“Nice shirt.” It can be a compliment, it can be an insult, it can be someone noticing you… it can mean so many different things, depending on our interpretation of the person’s tone of voice. I could feel hurt or insulted by those two words, because I feel the person saying them wasn’t sincere. That doesn’t mean that I am right. It is simply how I feel. I might have already felt insecure about wearing it. Or simply having a bad day. Getting upset over a perceived insult, is handing control over to my emotions, it is not rational at all. 

If I take a step back, a little later, look at the situation again, I might realize, no, the person was being genuinely nice. But for that realization to set in, we need to put our feelings and emotions aside long enough to look at it rationally. 

My mom and my sister are people who let their emotions guide them, I know that, and I know how to talk them down and help them look at situations more rational. This is no big deal, it’s something I’m used to. Something I’ve done all of my life. I expect that approach from them. 

My stepdad was always the most rational of us all. He’d be able to listen to the three of us argue and shut the argument down in less than three sentences, usually simply pointing out that we are all agreeing just coming from different perspectives. Yeah, we liked to argue at the dinner table when I was growing up, it’s important, it helps you articulate your thoughts and opinions. We also learnt to listen to each other and let everyone speak their mind. It helps.

Anyways. It is very strange when someone you have known most of your life, someone who you thought you understood as well as you did the rest of your family, the one person who always understood you, even when the rest of the family didn’t, suddenly changed the way they approach issues. My stepdad always supported me and encouraged my natural curiosity and critical thinking. He taught me to question things and find the truth. Now, he just repeats what the mainstream media says, he doesn’t question what is going on in the world. Doesn’t encourage my critical thinking anymore. He, just like the rest of my family, regularly try to get me to stop questioning what is going on and to just do what we are told. 

It’s scary. Honestly, that is one of the things that has scared me the most in the last two years and made me realize how even people you would’ve never thought possible, can easily be manipulated and brainwashed. And that knowledge is terrifying.

It is also very strange when you realize that at some point in the last two years you have become the most rational one in the family.