There’s this thing that I have noticed in TV shows over the last few years and it really bothers and worries me.

Male characters are being put into mentally and emotionally abusive relationships in the name of feminism and girl power. And it is being celebrated. The male characters are being called toxic, and horrible and the reason why the show sucks or their treating the female characters wrong or just things like that. Sometimes there might be some truth to that, most of the times it isn’t so.

Yet, female characters aren’t being called out. 

Not when they treat their male partners horribly wrong or even when they act in unacceptable ways. A lot of times the writers use other characters to tell us how amazing the female character is, how flawless and how intelligent and just so very perfect and the male character can be so very grateful she’s decided to be with him. 

Yet, what they show us is a completely different thing. 

She’s always right, even if she’s wrong and the viewer knows she’s wrong. She belittles her partner constantly. She makes everything about herself, as an example he learns he has an eight-year-old child he thought his ex-girlfriend had miscarried, and his current girlfriend snooped after him, found out only hours after him and gets mad at him for not telling her, while he still hasn’t managed to wrap his head around the entire situation. But she’s the one in the right. That’s what the writers tell us, that’s what everyone agrees with. 

No, she is not! She had no right to snoop after him and expect him to go straight to her and tell her. His entire world was spinning. He had a child, he was told was never even born. Honestly, who wouldn’t need some time by themselves to wrap their head around that before going and telling your partner? 

But this is what is being promoted. The woman is always right, even when she’s wrong. Even when she’s crossing boundaries. And the man is always wrong and should be thankful, she gives him the time of day. 

There are some shows that I love but can no longer watch without getting a physical reaction to whenever a pairing like that shows up. It makes me so uncomfortable and sick. Emotional and mental abuse is being promoted and sold to us as the perfect relationship. And the woman is always the victim, even when she’s very obviously the abuser. Putting him down regularly, indirectly telling him he’s stupid, he’s damaged, making fun of his trauma. 

This is not okay, this shouldn’t be something that becomes normal. This shouldn’t be something today’s children grow up with and idolize, internalize and believe to be true love. 

It is sick, it is wrong, and it needs to be talked about. This is not girl power or feminism. It should not be sold as that either.